These letters were sent between April 46 and May 45 B.C.
The translation is by E.O. Winstedt (1918). Click on the L symbols to go to the Latin text of each section. Click on ** to go to the translator's footnotes.
CONTENTS: 1 2 3 4 5 5a 5b 5c 6 6a 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 18a 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 37a 38 38a 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53
← Book 11
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
On the eleventh day after parting from you I have scribbled these few lines while leaving my country house before daybreak. I am thinking of stopping to-day at my place at Anagnia, to-morrow at Tusculum and staying there one day. On the 26th then to our tryst; and I only wish I could run straight to the embraces of my Tullia and the lips of Attica. What those little lips are prattling, please write and let me know, while I am at Tusculum, or, if she is in the country, what she is writing to you: and in the meantime pay my respects by letter or in person to her, and to Pilia too. And all the same, though we are to meet at once, write to me, if you have anything to say.
2 As I was folding up this letter, a messenger came in the night to me with a letter of yours, and on reading it I was naturally very sorry to hear of Attica's slight attack of fever. Everything else I was wanting to hear, I learn from your letter. You say it is a sign of old age to want a bit of fire in the morning: it's a worse sign of old age to be a bit weak in your memory. I had arranged for the 27th with Axius, the 28th with you, and the 26th, the day I arrive, with Quintus. So please count on that: there is no new arrangement. ** What's the use of writing then? What's the use of our meeting and chattering about everything that comes into our heads? A bit of gossip is something after all, and, even if there is nothing in our talk, the mere fact of talking together has some charms.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
All the same there are reports here that Murcus ** has been lost at sea, that Asinius reached shore alive to fall into the soldiers' ** hands, that 50 ships have been carried to Utica by this contrary wind, that Pompey ** is nowhere to be found and never has been in the Baleares, as Paciaecus declares. But there is no definite authority for any of this. That is what people have been saying while you are away. 2 Meanwhile there are the games at Praeneste. That's where Hirtius and all that crew are; and there are eight days of games! Picture their dinners and their extravagant goings on. Perhaps in the meantime the great question has been settled. What people they are! So Balbus is building: he does not care. But, if you ask me, is not life over and done with, when a man begins to look for pleasure rather than duty? In the meantime you slumber on. Now is the time the problem must be solved, if you mean to do anything. If you ask me what I think, I think "Gather ye roses." ** But what's the good of going on? I shall see you at once, and I hope you will come straight from the road to me. For we will arrange a day for Tyrannio at the same time, ** and anything else there is to do.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
You are the only person I know less given to flattery than myself, and, if we both fall into it sometimes in the case of other people, certainly we never use it to one another. So listen to what I am saying with all sincerity. On my life, Atticus, I don't count even the Isles of the Blest, let alone my place at Tusculum - though in other respects I'm comfortable enough there - worth so long a separation from you. So let us harden our hearts for these three days - assuming that you are affected as I am, which I am sure is the case. But I should like to know whether you are starting to-day ** immediately after the auction, and on what day you are coming. In the meantime I am buried in my books, and annoyed that I have not got Vennonius' history. 2 But, not to neglect business altogether, for that debt that Caesar assigned to me ** there are three means I might use. I could buy the property at a public auction; but I would rather lose it - it comes to the same thing in the end, besides the disgrace. I might transfer my rights for a bond payable a year hence by the buyer: but whom can I trust, and when would that "year of Meton" ** come? Or I might accept Vettienus' ** proposal and take half paid down. So look into the matter. The fact is I am afraid Caesar may not hold any auction now, but, as soon as his games are over, may run off to the aid of his stammering friend, ** not to slight so important a person. But I will attend to the matter. Pray take care of Attica and give her and Pilia and Tullia my kindest greetings.
How glad I was of your delightful letter! Why, it made my day a red-letter day after all. For I was anxious because Tiro had said you looked to him rather flushed. So I will stay another day, as you suggest.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
2 But about the 'Cato', ** that's a puzzle fit for Archimedes. I cannot manage to write anything that your boon companions could read, I won't say with pleasure, but even without annoyance. If I steer clear of his utterances in the senate and of his entire political outlook and policy, and content myself with simply eulogising his unwavering constancy, even that would be no pleasant hearing for them. But he is a man who cannot properly be eulogised, unless these points are fully treated, that he foresaw the present state of affairs, and tried to prevent it, and that he took his own life by preference to seeing it come about. Can I win Aledius' approval of any of that? But pray be careful of yourself and devote the common sense you devote to other things, before all to recovering your health.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
"Quintus the elder for the fourth time" ** or rather for the thousandth time is a fool to rejoice in his son's new office ** and in Statius, that he may see a double disgrace heaped on his house. I may add Philotimus as a third disgrace. His folly would be unparalleled, if my own had not been greater. But what cheek of him to ask you for a contribution towards it! Even suppose he had not come to a "fount athirst," but to a Pirene or "the hallowed spot where Alpheus took breath," ** to think of his drawing on you as his fountain, to use your word, especially when he is in such straits! Where will such conduct end? 2 But that is his own look out.
Myself I am delighted with my 'Cato': but then Lucilius Bassus is delighted with his works too.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
About Caelius you must make enquiries, as you say: I know nothing. But one must get to know his character as well as his resources. If you have any doubts about Hortensius and Verginius, look into the matter: though, so far as I can see, you are not likely to find anything that will suit better. Deal with Mustela as you say, when Crispus has arrived. I have written to Avius to tell Piso all he knows about the gold: for I quite agree with you, I have delayed too long already and must get in all I can from every source. I quite realise that you are doing nothing and thinking of nothing except my concerns, and that your longing to come to me is prevented by my business. But in my imagination you are with me, not only because you are managing my affairs, but because I seem to see how you are managing them, for I know what you are doing in every single one of your working hours.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
I see Tubulus was praetor in the consulship of L. Metellus and Q. Maximus. ** Now I should like to know when P. Scaevola the pontifex maximus was tribune. I think it was in the next year, under Caepio and Pompey, as he was praetor under L. Furius and Sex. Atilius. ** So please give me the date of his tribunate, and, if you can, the charge on which Tubulus was tried. ** Pray look and see too whether L. Libo, who brought in the bill about Ser. Galba, was tribune in the consulship of Censorinus and Manilius or in that of T. Quinctius and M'. Acilius. ** For I was confused by a passage at the end of Brutus' epitome of Fannius' history. Following that I made Fannius, the author of the history, son-in-law of Laelius. But you refuted me by rule and line; now however Brutus and Fannius have refuted you. I had followed a good authority, Hortensius, for my statement in 'Brutus'. ** So please set the matter straight.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
I have sent Tiro to meet Dolabella. He will return on the 13th. I shall expect you on the next day. I see you are putting Tullia before everything, and I earnestly beg you to do so. So her dowry is untouched: for that is what you say. For myself, though I had to avoid pay-day, ** to keep off the money-lenders' precious books, and make up my accounts, there was nothing to compensate for my absence from you. When I was at Rome and expected to see you every minute, still the hours I spent in expecting you every day seemed long. You know I am nothing of a flatterer, and so I rather understate my feelings.
[6] L { intercalary ** month 46 }
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
As to Caelius, please see that there is nothing lacking in the gold. I know nothing about that. But anyhow there is loss enough in the exchange. If there is anything wrong with the gold on the top of that - but what's the use of my talking? You will see to it. There is a specimen of Hegesias' style, ** of which Varro approves. 2 Now I come to Tyrannio. Do you really mean it? ** How unfair, without me! Think how often, even when I had plenty of time, I refused without you. How are you going to atone for your crime then? There is only one way: you must send me the book. I earnestly entreat you to do so; though the book itself will not delight me more than your admiration of it has. For I love everyone who loves learning and I am glad you admired so strongly an essay on so minute a point. But that is you all over. You want knowledge, which is the only mental food. But please tell me what there was in that acute and grave treatise which contributed to your summum bonum.
However I'm making a long story of it, and you may be busy about some of my business. And in return for that dry basking in the sun, in which you revelled in my meadow, I shall claim from you a richer and a warmer glow. ** But to return to my first point. If you love me, send me the book: for it is yours of course, as it was sent to you.
[6a] L { intercalary month 46 }
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
3 "What, so much leisure from your own affairs" ** that you have found time to read the 'Orator' too. Bravo! I am pleased to hear it, and shall be still more pleased if you will get your copyists to alter Eupolis to Aristophanes ** not only in your own copy but in others too. 4 Caesar seemed to me to be amused at your use of 'quaeso', as rather quaint and refined. He bade you have no anxiety in such a way that I had no doubts left. ** I am sorry Attica's attack lasts so long: but, as she has lost her shivering fits now, I hope it will be all right.
[7] L { intercalary month 46 }
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
I have scribbled a note with all you want on a tablet, and given it to Eros - quite shortly, but more than you ask for. In it I have spoken about my son, of whose intentions you gave me the first hint. I took a most liberal tone with him, and, if you think it convenient, I should like you to ask him about that. But why put it off? I pointed out that you had told me what he wished to do and what he wanted: "he wished to go to Spain, ** and wanted a liberal allowance." As for the allowance, I said I would give him as much as Publilius or Lentulus the flamen gave their sons. Against Spain I brought forward two arguments, the first, the one I used to you, that I was afraid of adverse criticism: "Was it not enough that we abandoned one side? Must we take the other?" The second that he would be annoyed, if his cousin enjoyed Caesar's intimacy and general goodwill more than he did. I should prefer him to make use of my liberal offer rather than of his liberty. However I gave him permission; for I saw you did not really dislike the idea. I shall think the matter over carefully, and I hope you will too. It is an important point: to stay is simple, to go risky. But we shall see.
2 About Balbus I have written in the tablet, and I think of doing as you say, as soon as he comes back. If he is rather slow about it, still I shall be three days there; and, I forgot to say, Dolabella will be with me too.
[8] L { intercalary month 46 }
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
My plan for my son meets with general approval. I have found a suitable companion. ** But let us first see to the payment of an instalment of Tullia's dowry. The time is near and Dolabella is in a hurry. Please write and tell me what Celer says Caesar has settled about the candidates, whether he thinks of going to the field of Fennel or the field of Mars. ** I should much like to know too whether I must come to Rome for the elections. For I must do my duty by Pilia and anyhow by Attica.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
I should be perfectly comfortable here and become more and more so every day, if it weren't for the reason I mentioned in my former letter. Nothing could be pleasanter than this solitude, except for the occasional interruptions of Amyntas' son. ** How his chatter does bore one! All the rest is more charming than you can imagine, the villa, the shore, the sea view, the hillocks and everything. But they don't deserve a longer letter, and I have nothing else to say, and I'm very sleepy.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
I am very sorry to hear about Athamas. But your grief, though it is a kindly weakness, should be kept well in check. There are many roads to consolation, but this is the straightest: let reason bring about what time is sure to bring about. Let us take care of Alexis, the living image of Tiro, whom I have sent back to Rome ill, and, if there
is any epidemic on the hill, ** send him to my place with Tisamenus. The whole of the upper story is vacant as you know. This I think is an excellent suggestion.
[11] L { intercalary month 46 }
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
I am sorry to hear about Seius. But one has to learn to put up with all human troubles. For what are we ourselves and how long will they be bothering us? Let us look to a thing that is more in our power, though not very much, - what we are to do about the Senate. And, before I forget it, Caesonius sent me word that Sulpicius' wife Postumia had paid him a visit. As to Pompey's daughter I answered you saying I was not thinking of her at present. I suppose you know the other lady you write about. The ugliest thing I ever saw. But I am coming to town at once: so we will discuss it ** together.
When I had sealed this letter I received yours. I am very glad to hear Attica is so cheerful; and I'm grieved about the slight indisposition.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
With regard to the dowry make all the more effort to clear the business up. To make over the debt to Balbus is a high-handed proceeding. ** Get it settled anyhow. It is disgraceful to let the thing hang fire. The island at Arpinum would be an excellent place for a shrine, but I'm afraid it's too far out of the way to convey much honour. So my mind is set on the garden: however I'll have a look at it, when I arrive.
2 About Epicurus you shall have your way: ** but in the future I shall change my plan as regards the persons in my dialogues. You'd never believe how eager some people are for a place. So I shall confine myself to the ancients: that avoids invidious distinctions. I have nothing to say; but I've made up my mind to write every day to draw letters from you, not that there is anything I expect from them, still somehow or other I do expect something. So whether you have any news or not, anyhow write something; and take care of yourself.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
I am upset about Attica, though I agree with Craterus. Brutus' letter, though full of wise saws and friendliness, drew from me many tears. This solitude stirs my grief less than your crowded city. You are the only person I miss; but I find no more difficulty about my literary work than if I were at home. Still the old anguish oppresses me and will not leave me, though I give you my word I do not give way to it, but fight against it.
2 As to what you say about Appuleius, I don't think you need exert yourself, or trouble Balbus and Oppius. He has promised them and told them to let me know that he will not bother me at all. But take care that my plea of ill-health is put in every day. Laenas promised to certify. Add C. Septimius, and L. Statilius. Indeed anyone you ask will pass his word for it. But if there is any difficulty, I will come and swear myself to chronic ill-health. Since I am going to miss the banquets, ** I would rather seem to do so according to the rules than on account of grief. Please dun Cocceius. He hasn't fulfilled his promise: and I am wanting to buy a hiding-place and a refuge for my sorrow.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
I wrote to you yesterday about offering my excuses to Appuleius. I don't think there will be any bother. Any one you apply to is sure not to refuse. But see Septimius, Laenas and Statilius. There must be three. However Laenas undertook the whole matter for me.
2 You say you have been dunned by Junius. Well anyhow Cornificius is rich enough to pay: but I should like to know when they say I went bail for him, and whether it was for the father or the son. Still for all that, do as you say, and see Cornificius' agents and Appuleius the estate agent.
3 You are as kind as usual in wishing that I could get some relief from my grief; but you can bear witness that it is no fault of mine. For every word that has been written by anyone on the subject of assuaging grief I read at your house. But my sorrow is beyond any consolation. Why, I have done what no one has ever done before, tried to console myself by writing a book. ** I will send it to you as soon as it is copied out. I assure you no other consolation equals it. I write the whole day long, not that it does any good, but it acts as a temporary check: not very much of that, for the violence of my grief is too strong; but still I get some relief and try with all my might to attain some composure of countenance, if not of mind. In so doing sometimes I think I am doing wrong, and sometimes that I should be doing wrong, if I were not to do it. Solitude helps a little, but it would have much more effect, if you at any rate could be with me: and that is my only reason for leaving, for the place is as right as any could be under the circumstances. However even the idea of seeing you upsets me: for now you can never feel the same towards me. I have lost all you used to love.
4 I have mentioned Brutus' letter to me before: it was full of wise saws, but nothing that could help me. To you he wrote asking if I should like his company. Yes, it would do me some good, as he has so great an affection for me. If you have any news, please write and let me know, especially when Pansa is going. ** I am sorry about Attica, but I believe Craterus. Tell Pilia not to worry: my sorrow is enough for all.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
See that my excuses are paid to Appuleius every day, since you do not approve of one general excuse. In this solitude I don't speak to a soul. In the morning I hide myself in a dense and wild wood, and I don't come out till the evening. After you I have not a greater friend than solitude. In it my only converse is with books, though tears interrupt it. I fight against them as much as I can: but as yet I am not equal to the struggle. I will answer Brutus as you suggest. You shall have the letter to-morrow. Give it to a messenger, when you have one.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
I do not wish you to neglect your business to come to me. I would rather go to you, if you are delayed any longer. However I should never even have come out of sight of you, if it were not that I absolutely could not get relief from anything. If there were any alleviation for my sorrow, it would be in you alone, and, as soon as any will be possible from anyone, it will come from you. Yet at this very moment I cannot bear
your absence. But it did not seem right to stay in your house and I could not stay at my own house; and, if I stayed somewhere nearer, still I should not be with you, for you would be prevented from being with me by the same reason that you are now. For myself, this solitude has suited me better than anything so far, though I am afraid Philippus will destroy it. He came yesterday evening. Writing and reading do not soften my feelings, they only distract them.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
Marcianus has written to tell me that my excuses were made with Appuleius by Laterensis, Naso, Laenas, Torquatus and Strabo. Please send them a letter on my behalf, thanking them for what they have done. As for what Flavius says, that more than 25 years ago I went bail for Cornificius, though the defendant is well off, and Appuleius is a respectable estate agent, I should be glad, if you would verify the truth of that statement from the account books of the other sureties; for before my aedileship ** I had no dealings with Cornificius. It may be so: but I should like to know for certain. And please demand payment from his agents, if you think it right. However it's of no importance: but still - . Let me know when Pansa departs, when you know yourself. Pay my respects to Attica, and pray look after her well. Greet Pilia for me.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
In trying to escape from the painful sting of recollection I take refuge in recalling something to your memory. Whatever you think of it, please pardon me. The fact is I find that some of the authors over whom I am poring now, consider appropriate the very thing that I have often discussed with you, and I hope you approve of it. I mean the shrine. ** Please give it all the attention your affection for me dictates. For my part I have no doubt about the design (I like Cluatius' design), nor about the erection (on that I am quite determined); but I have some doubts about the place. So please consider it. I shall use all the opportunities of this enlightened age to consecrate her memory by every kind of memorial borrowed from the genius of all the masters, Greek and Latin. Perhaps it will only gall my wound: but I consider myself pledged by a kind of vow or promise; and I am more concerned about the long ages, when I shall not be here, than about my short day, which, short though it is, seems all too long to me. I have tried everything and find nothing that gives me rest. For, while I was engaged on the essay I mentioned before, I was to some extent fostering my grief. Now I reject everything and find nothing more tolerable than solitude. Philippus has not disturbed it as I feared: for after paying me a visit yesterday he returned at once to Rome.
2 I have sent you the letter I have written at your suggestion to Brutus. Please have it delivered with your own. However I have sent you a copy of it, so that, if you don't approve of it, you may not send it.
3 You say my private affairs are being properly managed. Write and tell me what they are; for there are some things I am expecting to hear about. See that Cocceius does not disappoint me: for I count Libo's promise, of which Eros writes, as trustworthy. My capital of course I leave in Sulpicius' and Egnatius' hands. Why trouble yourself about Appuleius, when my excuse is so easily made?
4 About coming to me as you suggest, take care not to inconvenience yourself. It is a long way, and it will cost me many a pang to let you go again, when you want to go, which may happen very quickly. But just as you please. Whatever you do, I shall count it right and know you have done it for my sake.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
When I learned yesterday from other people's letters of Antony's arrival I wondered there was nothing in yours. But perhaps it was written a day earlier than it was dated. It does not matter a bit to me; but I suppose he has rushed back to save his sureties. **
2 You say Terentia is talking about the witnesses to my will. In the first place bear in mind that I am not troubling my head about those things, and this is no time for any new or unimportant business. But anyhow are the two cases parallel? She did not invite anyone she thought would ask questions, if they did not know the contents of the will. Was I likely to be afraid of anything of the kind? However let her do what I do. I will hand over my will to anyone she likes, to read. She will find I could not have treated my grandson ** more handsomely than I have. As to my not calling certain people as witnesses, in the first place it never entered my mind, and in the second the reason why it never entered it, was because it was of no importance. You know, if you remember, that I told you to bring some of your friends. What need was there of many? I had asked members of my household. Then you thought I ought to send for Silius. Hence it came about that I sent for Publilius. But neither of them was necessary. Manage the point as you think fit.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
This is certainly a delightful place, right on the sea and within sight of Antium and Circeii. But we must remember how it may change hands an infinite number of times in the countless years to come, if our empire last, and must arrange that that shrine may remain as consecrated ground. For my part I don't want a large income now and can be contented with little. I think at times of buying some gardens across the Tiber, especially for this reason: I don't see any other place that can be so much frequented. But what gardens, we will consider together; provided only that the shrine must be completed this summer. However settle with Apella of Chios about the columns.
2 What you say about Cocceius and Libo I approve, especially as regards my serving on juries. If you have ascertained anything about my guarantee, I should like to know, and anyhow, what Cornificius' agents say, though I don't want you to take much trouble about the matter, when you are so busy. About Antony, Balbus and Oppius too have written to me saying you wished them to write, to save me from anxiety. I have thanked them. I should wish you to know however, as I have said before, that I was not disturbed at that news and shall never be disturbed at any again. 3 If Pansa has set out to-day, as you thought, henceforth begin to tell me in your letters what you expect about Brutus' return, I mean about what day. That you can easily guess, if you know where he is at the time of writing.
4 As regards your letter to Tiro about Terentia, I beg you, Atticus, to undertake the whole matter. You see there is a question of my duty concerned, and you know all about that: besides, some think there is my son's interest. With me it is the first point that weighs most, as being the more sacred and the more important: especially as I don't think she is either sincere or reliable about the second.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
You don't seem yet to see how little Antony disturbed me nor how little anything of that kind ever can disturb me now. About Terentia I wrote to you in the letter I sent yesterday. You exhort me and you say others want me to hide the depth of my grief. Can I do so better than by spending all my days in writing? Though I do it, not to hide, but rather to soften and to heal my feelings, still, if I do myself but little good, I certainly keep up appearances.
2 My letter is shorter than it might be, because I am expecting your answer to mine of yesterday. I am most anxious about the shrine and a little about Terentia too. Please let me know in your next letter whether Cn. Caepio, father of Claudius' wife Servilia, perished by shipwreck during his father's life or after his death, and whether Rutilia died before or after her son C. Cotta. ** They concern the book I have written on the lightening of grief. **
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
I have read Brutus' letter ** and am sending it back to you. It is not at all a sensible answer to the points in which you found him wanting. But that is his look out: though in one thing it shows disgraceful ignorance on his part. He thinks Cato was the first to deliver a speech for the punishment of the conspirators, though everybody except Caesar had spoken before him: and that, though Caesar's speech, delivered from the praetorian bench, was so severe, those of the ex-consuls, Catulus, Servilius, the Luculli, Curio, Torquatus, Lepidus, Gellius, Volcacius, Figulus, Cotta, L. Caesar, C. Piso, M'. Glabrio, and even the consuls elect Silanus and Murena, were milder. Why then was the division taken on Cato's proposal? Because he had summed up the same matter in clearer and fuller words. My merit according to Brutus lay in bringing the affair before the senate, not in finding it out, nor in urging them to take steps, nor yet in making up my own mind before I took the senate's opinion. And it was because Cato extolled those actions of mine to the skies and moved that they should be put on record, that the vote was taken on his motion. Brutus again seems to think he is giving me high praise by calling me an "excellent consul." Why, has anyone, even a personal enemy, ever used a more grudging term? To the rest of your criticisms too what a poor answer he has given! He only asks you to alter the point about the decree of the Senate. He would have done as much as that at the suggestion of a clerk. But that again is his own look out.
2 Since you approve of the garden idea, manage it somehow. You know my resources. If I get something back from Faberius, there will be no difficulty. But I think I can manage even without that. Drusus' gardens are certainly for sale, and I think those of Lamianus and Cassianus too. But, when we meet -
3 About Terentia I cannot say anything more suitable than you do in your letter. Duty must be my first consideration. If I have made a mistake, I would rather have to repent for her sake than for my own. 4 C. Lollius' wife Ovia has to be paid 100,000 sestertii. Eros says it can't be done without me, I suppose because some property has to pass between us at a valuation. ** I wish he had told you. For, if, as he said, the matter is arranged, and that is not precisely where he is deceiving me, it could be managed through you. Please find out and finish it.
5 In calling me back to the forum, you call me to a place I shunned even in my happy days. What have I to do with a forum, where there are no law-courts, no Senate, and where people are continually obtruding themselves on my sight, whom I cannot endure to see? You say people are demanding my presence at Rome, and will not allow me to be absent, or at any rate only for a certain time. Rest assured that I have long held you at a higher value than them all. Myself too I do not underrate, and I far prefer to trust my own judgment than that of all the rest. However I am not going further than the wisest heads allow. I have not only read all their writings on the point, which in itself shows I am a brave invalid and take my medicine, but I have transferred them to my own work; and that certainly does not argue a mind crushed and enfeebled. Do not call me back from these remedies into that busy life, for fear I relapse.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
About Terentia, I do not recognise your usual consideration for me in throwing the whole weight of the matter on me. For those are the very wounds I cannot touch without deep groans. So please spare me, if you can. For I am not asking you more than you can do. 2 You and you only can see what is fair. About Rutilia, as you seem to have doubts, write and let me know as soon as you know, but let that be as soon as possible: and also whether Clodia survived her son D. Brutus the ex-consul. The latter you can find out from Marcellus, or at any rate from Postumia, the former from M. Cotta or Syrus or Satyrus.
3 About the gardens I earnestly entreat your aid. I must employ all my own resources and those of friends, who I know will not desert me: but I can manage with my own. There are things I could sell easily too. But without selling anything, if I pay interest to the person from whom I buy for no more than a year, I can get what I want, if you assist me. The most available are those of Drusus, as he wants to sell. The next I think are Lamia's; but he is away. However scent out anything you can. Silius again never uses his at all, and he will very easily be satisfied with the interest. Regard it as your own business, and don't consider what suits my purse, for that I don't care, but what suits me.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
From the beginning of your letter "though I did not care what happened in Spain, still you would write," I thought you had some news from me: but I see you have answered my letter only as regards the forum and the Senate. But, you say, my house at Rome is a forum. What is the good of the house alone to me, if I have not the forum? I am dead and done for, Atticus, and have been this long while: but now I confess it, when I have lost the one link that bound me to life. So what I want is solitude. Still if in my despite anything drags me to Rome, I shall strive, if possible (and I will make it possible), to keep my grief from all eyes but yours, and, if it is anyhow possible, even from yours. Besides there is this reason for not coming. You remember the questions Aledius asked you. They are annoying to me even now. What do you suppose they will be, if I come?
2 Arrange about Terentia as you say, and rid me of this addition - though not the weightiest - to my weighty griefs and sorrows. To show you that my sorrow is not prostration, you have entered in your 'Annals' the date of the visit of Carneades and that famous embassy to Rome: ** I want to know now the cause of its coming. I think it was about Oropus: but I am not certain. And, if that is so, what was the point in question? Further, who was the most distinguished Epicurean of the time and the head of the Garden at Athens; also who were the famous politicians there? I think you can find all those things in Apollodorus' book.
3 It is annoying about Attica; but, as it is a mild attack, I expect it will be all right. About Gamala I had no doubt. For why was his father Ligus so fortunate? Need I mention my own case, when I am incapable of getting relief, though everything I wish were to happen.
The price you mention for Drusus' gardens I too had heard, and had written about it to you, yesterday I think. Whatever the price is, what is necessary is cheap. In my eyes, whatever you may think - for I know what I think of myself - it relieves my mind of a bounden duty, if not of sorrow.
I have written to Sicca, because he is intimate with L. Cotta. If nothing can be managed about gardens across the Tiber, Cotta has some at Ostia in a very public place. They are cramped for room, but more than sufficient for this purpose. Please think of that. But don't be afraid of the price you mention for the gardens. I don't want plate or raiment or any pleasant places now: I want this. I see, too, who can help me. But speak to Silius; you can't do better. I have given Sicca a commission too. He answered that he has made an appointment with him. So he will write and tell me what he has done, and you will see to it.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
I am glad Silius has settled the business: for I did not want to fail him and was afraid I might not be able to manage it. Settle about Ovia as you say. As to my son it seems high time now; but I want to know whether he can get a draft for his allowance changed at Athens or whether he must take it with him; and as regards the whole matter please consider how and when you think he ought to go. Whether Publilius is going to Africa and when, you can find out from Aledius. 2 Please enquire and let me know. And, to return to my own nonsense, please inform me whether P. Crassus, the son of Venuleia, died in the lifetime of his father, P. Crassus the ex-consul, as I seem to remember, or after his death. I also want to know whether my recollection is right that Regillus, son of Lepidus, died in his father's lifetime. 3 You must settle the business about Cispius and Precius. As to Attica, bravo! Pay my respects to her and to Pilia.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
Sicca has written to me in detail about Silius, and says he has reported the matter to you; and you say the same in your letter. I am pleased with the property and the conditions, except that I would rather pay money down than assign property at a valuation. Silius will not want show places and I can make myself contented on the income I have, though hardly on less. So where can I get ready money? You can extort 600,000 sestertii from Hermogenes, especially as it will be necessary; and I find I have another 600,000 by me. For the rest of the money I will either pay interest to Silius, until I get it from Faberius, or get the money to pay with at once from some debtor of Faberius. There will be some coming in too from other quarters. But you can take charge of the whole matter. 2 I much prefer them to Drusus' gardens; indeed the two have never been compared. Believe me I am actuated by one single motive. I know I have gone silly about it; but continue to bear with my folly. For it is no use your talking about a place to grow old in, ** that is all over. There are other things I want more.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
According to his letter Sicca is coming to me on the 23rd, even if he has not settled anything with A. Silius. You I excuse on the score of business, knowing what your business is. I have no doubt of your wish, or rather your eager desire, to be with me. 2 You mention Nicias. ** If I were in a condition to enjoy his cultivated conversation, he is one of the first persons I should wish to have with me. But solitude and retirement are my proper sphere: and it is because Sicca can content himself with that, that I am the more eager for his visit. Besides you know how delicate our Nicias is, and his luxurious way of living. So why should I want to put him to inconvenience, when he cannot give me any pleasure? However I am grateful to him for wishing it. There is one point you wrote about, which I have made up my mind not to answer. For I hope I have prevailed upon you to relieve me from the burden. ** My greetings to Pilia and Attica.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
As to the business with Silius, I know the terms well enough, but I expect to hear full details from Sicca to-day. Cotta's place, which you say you don't know, is beyond Silius' house, which I think you know. It is a shabby little house and very tiny, with no ground, and not big enough for anything except the purpose for which I require it. I am looking for a public position. But, if the matter is being settled about Silius' gardens, - that is, if you settle it, for it rests entirely with you - there is no reason for thinking of Cotta.
2 About my son I will do as you say. I will leave the time to him. See that he is provided with a bill of exchange for as much as is necessary. If you have been able to get anything out of Aledius, as you say, write and tell me. I gather from your letter, and certainly you will from mine, that we have nothing to say to each other - the same old things day after day, though they are long ago worn threadbare. Still I cannot help sending to you every day to get a letter from you. 3 However tell me about Brutus, if you have any information. For I suppose he knows now where to expect Pansa. If, as is generally the case, on the border of his province, he ought to be here about the first of the month. I wish it were later; for there are plenty of reasons why I shun the city. So I am even wondering whether I should make some excuse to him. I could do so easily enough. But there is plenty of time to think about it. My greetings to Pilia and Attica.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
About Silius I have learned nothing more from Sicca now he is here than from his letter, for he had written quite fully. So if you meet him, write and tell me your views. As to the matter on which you think a message has been sent to me, I don't know whether one has been sent or not; certainly not a word has been said to me. So go on as you have begun, and, if you come to any arrangement that satisfies her, which I don't think at all likely, take my son with you to her, if you like. It is to his interest to appear to have wanted to do something to please her; I have no interest in the matter, except that you know of, which I consider important.
2 You call me back to my old way of life. Well, I have long been bewailing the loss of the Republic, and that was what I was doing, though less strongly; for I had one harbour of refuge. Now I positively cannot follow my old way of life and employment; nor do I think I ought to care what others think about that. My own conscience is more to me than all their talk. For the consolation I have sought in writing, I am not discontented with my measure of success. It has made me show my grief less; but the grief itself I could not lessen, nor would I, if I could.
3 About Triarius you interpret my wishes well. However do nothing without his family's consent. I love him, though he is dead: I am guardian to his children, and feel affection for all his household. As regards the business with Castricius, if he is willing to take money estimated at its present rate instead of the slaves, nothing could be more convenient. But, if things have gone so far that he is taking the slaves away, I don't think it is fair to him to ask him (you ask me to give you my real opinion); for I don't want my brother Quintus to have any bother, and I rather fancy you take the same view. If Publilius is waiting for the equinox, as you say Aledius tells you, I suppose he is going by sea; but he told me he was going by way of Sicily. I should like to know which it is and when. I should like you too some time at your convenience to pay a visit to little Lentulus ** and assign him such of the household as you think fit. Love to Pilia and Attica.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
You say you will see Silius to-day; so to-morrow, or as soon as you can, write, if anything comes of your meeting. I am not trying to avoid Brutus, though I don't expect to get any consolation from him. But there are reasons why I do not want to go there at this particular time. If those reasons continue to exist, I shall have to find some excuse to offer him, and by the look of things at present, I think they will continue.
2 As for the gardens, please finish the business. The main point is what you know. A further consideration is that I myself want something of the kind; for I cannot exist in a crowd, nor can I be far from you. For my purpose I cannot see anything better adapted than that particular place, and I should like to know what your opinion is. I am quite sure, especially as I see you think so too, that Oppius and Balbus are very fond of me. Let them know how eager I am for the gardens and why; but that it is only possible, if the business with Faberius is settled; and ask whether they will go bail for the payment. Even if I must bear some loss in return for getting ready money, draw them on as far as they will go: for there is no chance of getting the full debt. In fact, find out if they show any inclination to assist my plan. If they do, it is a great assistance; if not, we must manage somehow or other. Look upon it as "a place to grow old in," to use your own phrase, or if you like as a burial place for me. It is no use thinking of the place at Ostium. If we don't get this, I feel sure, we shall not get Lamia's; so we must try for Damasippus' place.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
I am trying to find something to say to you; but there is nothing. The same things every day. I am much obliged to you for paying a visit to Lentulus. Assign him as many slaves as you like and select them yourself. As to Silius' inclination to sell and his price, you seem to fear first that he won't want to sell and secondly not at that price. Sicca thought differently; but I agree with you. So, as he suggested, I wrote to Egnatius. Silius wants you to speak to Clodius. You have my full consent to do so, indeed it is more convenient than for me to write to Clodius myself, as he wanted. 2 As to Castricius' slaves I think it is most convenient that Egnatius should carry the matter through, ** as you say you think he will. With Ovia please see that some arrangement is made. As you say it was night when you wrote, I expect more in today's letter.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
Sicca is surprised that Silius has changed his mind. For my part I am more surprised that, when he makes his son the excuse - and it seems to me a good enough excuse, as his son is all he could wish - you say you think he will sell, if we add one other thing, which he shrinks from mentioning, though he has set his heart on it. ** 2 You ask me to fix my outside price and say how much I prefer them to Drusus' gardens. I have never been in them; I know Coponius' country house is old and not very large and the wood a fine one; but I don't know what either brings in, and that I think we ought to know. But for me either of them should be reckoned rather by my need than by the market value. However please consider whether I can get them or not. If I were to sell my claim on Faberius, I should have no doubt about settling for Silius' gardens even with ready money, if only he could be induced to sell. If his are not for sale, I should have recourse to Drusus, even at the price Egnatius said he asked. Hermogenes too can be a great assistance to me in getting ready money. You must not mind my being eager, one ought to be when one is wanting to make a purchase. However I won't give way to my wishes and my grief so far as not to be ruled by you.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
Egnatius has written to me. If he has spoken to you, write and tell me, for the matter can be arranged most conveniently through him, and I think that is what ought to be done. For I don't see any chance of settling with Silius. My greetings to Pilia and Attica.
The rest I have written myself. Pray see what can be done. 2 Publilia has written to me that her mother is coming to me with Publilius at his suggestion and that she will come too, if I will let her. She begs me urgently and humbly to allow her and to answer her. You see what a nuisance it is. I answered that I was even worse than when I told her I wanted to be alone; so she must not think of coming to me at the present time. I thought, if I had not answered, she would come with her mother, now I don't think she will. For evidently that letter is not her own. But the thing that I see will happen - that they will come to me - is the very thing I want to avoid, and the one way of avoiding it is for me to flee. I don't want to, but I must. Now I want you to find out how long I can stay without being caught. Act as you say, with moderation.
3 Please suggest to my son, that is if you think it fair, that he should keep the expenses of this journey within the rents of my property in the Argiletum and the Aventine, with which he would have been quite contented, if he stayed in Rome and hired a house, as he was thinking of doing: and, when you have made the suggestion, I should like you to arrange the rest, so that we may supply him with what is necessary from those rents. I will guarantee that neither Bibulus nor Acidinus nor Messalla, who I hear are at Athens, will spend more than he will get out of those rents. So please see who the tenants are and what they pay, secondly that they are punctual payers, and what journey money and outfit will suffice. There is certainly no need of a carriage at Athens, while for what he wants on the journey, we have more than enough, as you also observe.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
As I said in my letter yesterday, if Silius is the sort of man you think him and Drusus is hard to deal with, I should like you to approach Damasippus. He, I think, has divided up his property on the banks of the Tiber into lots of so and so many acres with fixed prices, which I don't know. So write and tell me, whatever you do.
2 I am much disturbed about dear Attica's ill- health, it almost makes me fear it is somebody's fault. But the good character of her tutor, the attention of her doctor, and the carefulness of the whole household in every way forbid me to entertain that suspicion. So take care of her. I can write no more.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
I could be very comfortable here considering my troubles even without Sicca - for Tiro is better; but, as you tell me to look out that I'm not caught, by which I am to understand you can't fix a day for the departure I mentioned, I thought the best thing would be to go to Rome. That I see is your opinion too. So to-morrow I shall go to Sicca's suburban place. Then I think I will stay at your place at Ficulea, as you suggest. 2 The matters you have mentioned we will investigate together, as I am coming. Your kindness, diligence and good sense both in managing my affairs and in forming plans and suggesting them in your letters, goes to my heart wonderfully. 3 However, if you do anything with Silius, even on the very day of my arrival at Sicca's place, please let me know, especially which part he wants to withdraw. You say "the far end." Take care that is not the very bit which, as you know, set me thinking about the thing at all. I am sending you a letter of Hirtius', which has just come. It is kindly expressed.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
It never occurred to me before I left you the other day, that if anything is spent on a monument in excess of whatever it is that the law allows, one has to give an equal sum to the public funds. That would not disturb me much, if it were not that somehow or other, perhaps without any good reason, I should be sorry for it to be called anything but a shrine. If I want that, I'm afraid I can't have it, unless I change the site. Please consider what there is in this point. For though I am less anxious and have almost recovered myself, still I want your advice. So I entreat you with more urgency than you wish or allow me to use, to give your whole mind to considering this question.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
I want it to be a shrine, and that idea cannot be rooted out of my mind. I am anxious to avoid its being taken for a tomb, not so much on account of the legal penalty as to get as near to deification as possible. That would be possible, if it were in the actual house where she died; but, as I have often said, I am afraid of its changing hands. Wherever I build it in the open, I think I can contrive that posterity shall respect its sanctity. You must put up with these foolish fancies of mine, for such I confess they are; for there is no one, not even myself, with whom I talk so freely as with you. But, if you approve of the project, the place and the plan, please read the law and send it to me. If any means of avoiding it occurs to you, we will adopt it.
2 If you should be writing to Brutus and don't think it out of place, reproach him for refusing to stay in my house at Cumae for the reason he gave you. For when I come to think of it, I don't think he could have done anything ruder. If you think we ought to go on with our idea about the shrine, I should like you to speak to Cluatius and spur him on. For, even if we decide on another place, I think we must make use of his labour and advice. Perhaps you may be going to your country house to-morrow.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
Yesterday I received two letters from you, one given the day before to Hilarus, the other on the same day to a letter-carrier; and on the same day I heard from my freedman Aegypta that Pilia and Attica are quite well. Thanks for sending Brutus' letter. He sent one to me too, which only reached me on the thirteenth day. I am forwarding the letter itself and a copy of my answer.
2 About the shrine, if you don't get me any gardens - and you ought, if you love me as much as I know you do - I approve highly of your scheme about the place at Tusculum. In spite of your acute powers of thought so bright an idea would never have come into your head, unless you had been very anxious for me to secure what I was very much bent on having. But somehow or other I want a public place; so you must contrive to get me some gardens.
Scapula's are the most public, and besides they are near and one can be there without spending the whole day in the country. So before you go away, I should very much like you to see Otho, if he is in town. If it comes to nothing, I shall go to such lengths as to rouse your wrath, accustomed though you are to my folly. For Drusus certainly is willing to sell. So, if there is nothing else, it will be my fault if I don't buy. Pray see that I don't make any mistake about it. The only way of making sure against that is to get some of Scapula's land, if possible. Please let me know, too, how long you are going to be in your suburban estate.
3 With Terentia her liking for you may help as much as your influence. But do as you think fit. For I know that you are generally more solicitous about my interests than I am myself.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
Hirtius tells me Sextus Pompeius has quitted Corduba and fled into Northern Spain, while Gnaeus has fled, I know not whither, nor do I care. No other news. His letter was posted from Narbo on the 18th of April. You mentioned Caninius' shipwreck as though it was doubtful; so let me know, if there is any certain information. You bid me cast off melancholy; very well, you will take a great load off my mind, if you give me a site for the shrine. Many points occur to me in favour of deification; but I badly want a place. So see Otho too.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
I have no doubt you are overwhelmingly busy, as you send me no letter. But what a scoundrel not to wait for your convenience when I sent him for that very reason! Now I suppose you are in your suburban estate, unless anything kept you. I sit here writing all day long, and get no relief, though it does distract my thoughts.
2 Asinius Pollio has written about my blackguardly kinsman. ** Balbus the younger gave me a clear enough hint lately, Dolabella a vague one, and Pollio states it quite openly. I should be annoyed, if there were any room left for a new sorrow. But could anything be more blackguardly? What a dangerous fellow! Though to me - . But I must restrain my feelings. There is no necessity for you to write, only write, if you have time.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
You think there ought to be outward and visible signs of my composure of spirit by this time, and you say some speak more severely of me than either you or Brutus mention in your letters. If those who think my spirit is crushed and broken knew the amount and the nature of the literary work I am doing, I fancy, if they are human, they would hold me guiltless. There is nothing to blame me for, if I have so far recovered as to have my mind free to engage in difficult writing, and even something to praise me for, if I have chosen this mode of diverting my thoughts as the most cultivated and the one most worthy of a man of learning. 2 But, when I am doing everything I can to cast off my sorrow, do you make an end of what I see you are as much concerned about as myself. I regard it as a debt and I cannot lay aside my care, till I have paid it or see that I can pay it, that is, till I have found a suitable place. If Scapula's heirs are thinking of dividing his garden into four parts and bidding for them among themselves, as you say Otho has told you, then there is no chance for a purchaser; but, if they put them up for sale, we will see what we can do. For that place of Publicius', which now belongs to Trebonius and Cusinius, has been offered to me; but you know it is a mere building plot. I can't put up with it at any price. Clodia's gardens I like, but I don't think they are for sale. Though you dislike Drusus' gardens, I shall have to come back to them, unless you find something. The building does not bother me. I shall only be building what I shall build in any case, even if I don't have the gardens. I am as pleased with "Cyrus, Books IV. and V." as with the rest of Antisthenes' works, ** though he is ingenious rather than learned.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
As a courier arrived without any letter from you, I inferred the reason was what you mentioned yesterday in the letter I am answering. Still I expected something about Asinius Pollio's letter. But I am too apt to reckon your leisure by my own. However I give you leave not to think yourself bound to write, except in case of necessity, unless you have plenty of leisure.
2 About the letter carriers I would do as you suggest, if there were any pressing letters, as there were lately. Then, however, the carriers kept up to their time every day, though the days were shorter, and we had something to write about, Silius, Drusus, and other things. Now, if Otho had not cropped up, there is nothing; and even that nothing has been deferred. However it cheers me to talk with you when we are not together, and still more to read your letters. But, as you are not at home (for I think you are not), and there is no necessity to write, let there be a truce to writing, unless some new point arises.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
What sort of thing Caesar's invective against my panegyric will be, I have seen from the book, which Hirtius has sent me. He has collected in it all Cato's faults, but given me high praise. So I have sent the book to Musca to pass on to your copyists; for I want it to be published. To facilitate that, please give your men orders.
2 I try my hand often at an essay of advice. I can't find anything to say; and yet I have by me Aristotle's and Theopompus' books to Alexander. But what analogy is there? They could write what was honourable to themselves and acceptable to Alexander. Can you find anything of that sort?
Nothing occurs to me. You say you are afraid my influence and my authority will be lessened by this sorrow of mine. For my part I don't see what people are complaining of or what they expect of me. Not to grieve? How is that possible! Not to be prostrated? No one was ever less prostrated. While I sought relief in your house, I was at home to every caller; and no one, who came, felt in the way. I came to Astura straight from you. Those cheerful friends of yours who blame me cannot read as much as I have written. How well it is written is not to the point, but it was a kind of writing that no one whose spirit was broken could do. I have been thirty days in these gardens. Who has failed to get access to me or conversation with me? At this very moment I am writing and reading so much that the people with me find the holiday harder work than I find working. 3 If anyone asks why I am not in town, "because it is the vacation": why I am not at one of my little places, where it is now the season, "because I could not put up with the crowd of visitors." So I am staying where the man, who prized Baiae more than anyone, always used to spend this part of the year. When I come to Rome, they shall have nothing to find fault with in my looks or my conversation. The cheerfulness with which I used to temper the sadness of the times, I have lost for ever: but there shall be no lack of courage and firmness in my bearing or my words.
4 As to Scapula's gardens, it seems possible that, as a favour, partly to you and partly to me, they may be put up at auction. If not, we are cut out. But, if it comes to an auction, my eagerness for them will conquer Otho's purse. For as to what you say about Lentulus, he can't run to it. If only the business with Faberius is settled and you make an effort, as you are doing, we shall get what we want.
5 You ask how long I am staying here: only a few days. But I am not certain. As soon as I have made up my mind, I will write to you: and do you write to me how long you are staying in your estate. On the day on which I am sending this I too got the news you send me about Pilia and Attica by letter and by word of mouth.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
I have nothing to write. But I want to know, where you are; and, if you are away or are going away, when you will return. So please send me word. You wanted to know, when I am leaving here: I have made up my mind to stay at Lanuvium on the 16th, and then at Tusculum or at Rome on the next day. Which I am going to do, you shall know on the day itself.
2 You know how full of grievances misfortune makes one. I have none against you; but still I have a hungry longing for the shrine. I will venture to say so much, and you must take it as you usually do, that unless I see it being built, I don't say finished, my resentment will redound on you, quite unjustly, but you will put up with what I am saying, as you put up with all my moods and always have put up with them. I wish you would confine your attempts at consolation to that one point. 3 If you want to know my wishes, I choose Scapula's place first, and then Clodia's: after them, if Silius won't agree and Drusus acts unfairly, Cusinius' and Trebonius' property. I think there is a third owner: I know for certain that Rebilus was one. If however you prefer my place at Tusculum, as you hinted in a letter, I will agree. Get the thing finished somehow, if you want to see me consoled. You are blaming me already more severely than is your wont, but you do it most affectionately, and I suppose it is my fault for making you do so. However, if you wish to see me consoled, this is the best consolation, or rather, to tell the truth, the only one.
4 If you have read Hirtius' letter, which seems to me a sort of first sketch of the tirade Caesar has written against Cato, let me know what you think of it, if you can. I return to the shrine. If it is not finished this summer (and we have the whole summer before us), I shall not think myself free from guilt.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
I have never asked you to fix a regular day for your letters: for I see the point you mention, and yet I suspect or rather I know there was nothing for you to write. On the 10th indeed I think you were away, and I am quite aware you have no news. However I shall write to you nearly every day: for I prefer to send letters to no purpose rather than for you to have no messenger to give one to, if there should be anything you think I ought to know. So on the 10th I got your letter with nothing in it. For what was there for you to put in it? However, the little there was, was pleasant to me: if nothing else, it taught me you had no news.
But you say something or other about Clodia. Where is she then or when is she coming? I prefer her grounds to anyone's except Otho's. 2 But I don't think she will sell: she likes the place and has plenty of money: and how difficult the other thing is, you are well aware. But pray let us make an effort to think out some way of getting what I want.
3 I think of leaving here on the 16th; but either for Tusculum or for Rome, and then on perhaps to Arpinum. When I know for certain, I will write.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
It had occurred to me to advise you to do exactly what you are doing. For I thought you could get that particular business over more conveniently at home without any fear of interruption.
2 As I said before, I intend to stop at Lanuvium on the 16th, and then either at Rome or Tusculum. You shall know in advance which. You are right in saying that will lighten my sorrow, but believe me it will do so to an extent which you cannot imagine. How eagerly I desire it you can judge from my daring to confess it to you, though I think you do not very much approve of it. But you must bear with my aberration. Bear with it? Nay you must help me in it. 3 I have doubts about Otho, perhaps because I am eager for his place. But anyhow the property is beyond my means, especially when we have to bid against a man, who is eager for the place, wealthy and one of his heirs. What I should prefer after that is Clodia's. But, if nothing can be done about those, do anything. I count myself more bound by sacred obligation than anyone ever was by any vow. Look into Trebonius' place too, though the owners are away. But, as I wrote yesterday, consider my Tusculan place too, that the summer may not slip away. That certainly must not happen.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
I am not at all annoyed that Hirtius wrote to you about me in a sympathetic tone (he was acting kindly), and still less at your not sending his letter to me, in which you were acting even more kindly. The reason why I want your copyists to circulate the book he sent me about Cato, is that their abuse may enhance Cato's reputation.
2 You say you are negotiating through Mustela. He is a very suitable person and very devoted to me since the affair of Pontianus. So get something settled. But what is wanted except an opening for a purchaser? And that could be got through any of the heirs. But I think Mustela will manage that, if you ask him. You will have provided me not only with the very place I want for my purpose, but a place to grow old in besides. For Silius' and Drusus' places don't seem to me quite fit for a paterfamilias. Why, I should have to spend whole days in the country house. So I prefer the others, Otho's first and then Clodia's. If nothing comes of it, then we must play a trick on Drusus or fall back on the place at Tusculum.
3 You have done wisely in shutting yourself up at home. But please get your business over and let me find you with some leisure again. As I said before, I am going from here to Lanuvium on the 16th, then on the 17th to Tusculum. For I have crushed down my feelings and perhaps have conquered them, if only it will last. So you shall hear to-morrow perhaps, at the latest the day after.
But what is this, please? Philotimus says Pompey is not shut in at Carteia (about that Oppius and Balbus had sent me a copy of a letter to Clodius of Patavium, saying they thought he was) and that there is quite an important war yet to come. Of course he always is a parody of Fulvinius. ** However have you any news? I want to know the facts about the shipwreck of Caninius too.
4 I have finished two large treatises ** here. It was the only way I could get away from my misery. As for you, even if you have nothing to write, which I think will be the case, write and tell me that you have nothing to say, provided you don't use those very words.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
That's good news about Attica. I am worried about your listlessness, though you say it is nothing. I shall find Tusculum more convenient, as I shall get letters from you more frequently and see you yourself at times: for in other respects things were more endurable at Astura. My feelings are not more harrowed by galling memories here than there; though to be sure, wherever I am, they are with me. 2 I wrote to you about your "neighbour" Caesar, because I learned about it from your letters. I would rather see him sharing the temple of Quirinus than of Safety. ** Yes, publish Hirtius' book. I thought the same as you say, that our friend's talent was shown by it, while its object, blackening Cato's character, only looked ridiculous.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
I think I shall conquer my feelings and go from Lanuvium to Tusculum. For I must either give up that estate for ever (for my grief will remain the same, only less visible), or it does not matter a straw whether I go there now or ten years hence. The place will not remind me of her any more than the thoughts that harass me day and night. "Oh!" you will say, "so books do not help." In this respect I am afraid they make it worse: perhaps I should have been braver without. For in a cultivated mind there is no roughness and no insensibility.
2 So you will come to me as you said, and only that if convenient. A letter apiece will be enough. I will even come to meet you, if necessary. So that shall be as you find possible.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
About Mustela, do as you say, though it will be a big business. For that reason I incline more to Clodia; though in both cases we must find out about Faberius' debt. There will be no harm in your speaking to Balbus about it and telling him, what is the truth, that we want to buy, but cannot without getting in that debt, and dare not, until something is settled. 2 But when is Clodia going to be in Rome, and how much do you think it will cost? Why I turn my thoughts to it is not that I should not prefer the other, but it is a big venture and it is difficult to contend with one who is eager for it, rich and one of the heirs. As far as eagerness goes, I yield to no one, but in the other respects we are worse off. However of this when we meet.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
Go on publishing Hirtius' book. About Philotimus I agree with you. I see your house will go up in value now you have Caesar for a neighbour. I am expecting my messenger to-day. He will tell me about Pilia and Attica.
I can easily believe you are glad to be at home: but I should like to know what business you still have or if you have finished now. I am expecting you at Tusculum, especially as you told Tiro you were coming at once, adding that you thought it necessary.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
I felt all the time how much good your presence was doing me: but I feel it still more since you have gone. So, as I wrote to you before, either I must come to you entirely or you to me, according as it can be managed.
2 Yesterday, soon after your departure, I think, some people, who looked like city men, brought me a message and a letter from Gaius Marius, son and grandson of Gaius. ** He begged me in the name of our relationship, in the name of Marius, on whom I had written, ** and by the eloquence of his grandfather, L. Crassus, to defend him: and he stated his case in full. I wrote back that he had no need of an advocate since his relative Caesar was omnipotent, and he was the best and most liberal of men: but I would support him. What times these are! To think of Curtius wondering whether to stand for the consulship. But enough of this.
3 I am anxious about Tiro. But I shall know soon how he is, for yesterday I sent a man to see, and I gave him a letter to you too. I have sent you a letter for my son. Please tell me for what day the sale of the gardens is advertised.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
Your departure has depressed me as much as your arrival cheered me. So, when you can, that is after you have attended Sextus' auction, visit me again. Even a single day will do me good, not to speak of the pleasure. I would come to Rome that we might be together, if I could make up my mind satisfactorily on a certain point.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
I have Tiro back with me earlier than I expected. Nicias has come too and to-day I hear Valerius is coming. However many come, I shall be more lonely than if you alone were here. But I expect you, at any rate after you've finished with Peducaeus; and you give some hint of an even earlier date. But let that be as you can.
2 For Vergilius, as you say. I should however like to know when the auction is. I see you think the letter ought to be sent to Caesar. Well, I thought so too very strongly, especially as there is nothing in it that the most loyal of citizens might not have written; loyal, that is to say, in the present circumstances, to which all politicians tell us we should bow. But you know I thought your Caesarian friends ** ought to read it first: so you must see to that. But, unless you feel sure they approve of it, it must not be sent. You will know whether they really think so or are pretending. I shall count pretence as rejection. You must probe that point.
3 Tiro has told me what you think about Caerellia: that it ill suits my dignity to be in
debt, and that I should give a note of hand,
"That you should fear the one and hold the other safe!"
But of this, and much else, when we meet. However, we must hold over the debt to Caerellia, if you agree, till we know about Meton and Faberius.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
You know L. Tullius Montanus who has gone with my son. I have received a letter from his sister's husband saying that, through going bail for Flaminius, Montanus owes Plancus 20,000 sestertii; and that he has made some request to you about it. I should like you to assist him by speaking to Plancus or in any other way you can. I feel under an obligation to help him. If you know more about it than I do, or if you think Plancus should be spoken to, I wish you would write to me, that I may know how the matter stands, and what I ought to ask him. 2 I am awaiting news as to what you have done about the letter to Caesar. About Silius I am not much concerned. You must get me either Scapula's or Clodia's gardens. But you seem to have some doubts about Clodia. Is it about the date of her arrival or as to whether the gardens are for sale? But what is this that I hear about Spinther divorcing his wife?
3 Make your mind easy about the Latin language. You will say, "What, when you write on such subjects?" ** They are copies, and don't give me much trouble. I only supply words, and of them I have plenty.
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
Though I have nothing to say to you, I write all the same, because I feel as though I were talking to you. Nicias and Valerius are here with me. I am expecting a letter from you early to-day. Perhaps there will be another in the afternoon, unless your letter to Epirus hinders you: I don't want to interrupt that. I have sent you letters for Marcianus and for Montanus. Please put them in the same packet, unless you have sent it off already.
1. Or, as Tyrrell suggests, "There's tit for tat. I have no news."
2. Statius Murcus, an officer in Caesar's army. He is mentioned again later in Fam. XII. 11, 1.
3. i.e. soldiers of Pompey, Asinius Pollio being another adherent of Caesar.
4. Cn. Pompeius, the eldest son of Pompey the Great.
5. 'Fructum' may be the first word of some proverb; but probably the word is corrupt, as the sentiment seems rather at variance with that expressed just above.
6. To read a book he had written, possibly on accents. Cf. Att. XII. 6.
7. Or, as Tyrrell and Shuckburgh, "whether you are coming to-day or, if not, on what day you are coming." But Cicero does not seem to have anticipated Atticus' arrival before three days.
8. Probably a debt owed to Cicero by some proscribed Pompeian.
9. Meton, an Athenian mathematician, of the beginning of the 5th century B.C., discovered the solar cycle of 19 years. "Meton's year" was proverbially used for an indefinitely long period.
10. A banker (cf. Att. X. 5) who proposed to take over the debt, in return for present payment of half the sum owed.
11. Balbus, if the reading is right; 'balbus' means "stutterer".
12. Cicero was planning to write a eulogy of Cato, who had recently committed suicide in Africa.
13. A quotation from a verse of Ennius, Quintus pater quartum fit consul, preserved in Aulus Gellius X. 1.
14. Caesar had restored the ancient priestly corporation of Luperci and the celebration of the Lupercalia on the Palatine hill on February 15.
15. From Pindar, Nem. 1, 1, where it is used of the Arethusa at Syracuse, which was popularly believed to be connected with the river Alpheus in the Peloponnese.
16. 142 B.C.
17. 136 B.C.
18. For taking a bribe, when presiding at a murder trial (Cicero, De Finibus, 2, § 54).
19. 150 or 149 B.C. Libo impeached Galba in 147 B.C. for selling the Lusitani, who had surrendered on promise of freedom, as slaves.
20. 'Brutus', § 101.
21. Interest was payable on the 1st of the month.
22. Before the alteration of the calendar made by Caesar in the next year, two months, of 29 and 28 days respectively, were inserted between November and December, 46 B.C., to set the calendar right.
23. Hegesias of Magnesia introduced the Asiatic school of rhetoric. Abrupt breaks such as that in the last sentence were one of its features.
24. Atticus had read the book of Tyrannio, which was referred to in XII. 2.
25. Cicero refers to the introduction of Atticus in his Brutus (24) in pratulo propter Platonis statuam; but his meaning is not very clear. Probably he only means that he is expecting to enjoy Atticus' hospitality soon.
26. Terence, Heaut. 75.
27. In the quotation from Aristophanes, Ach. 530, in Orat. 29.
28. There was a danger of Atticus' land at Buthrotum being confiscated, as Caesar was thinking of planting a colony there.
29. To fight for Caesar in the civil war which had been rekindled in Spain.
30. Cicero wished to send him to Athens with L. Tullius Montanus.
31. i.e. will he appoint the magistrates in Spain or let the elections at Rome take place? The campus Fenicularius was near Tarraco.
32. i.e. L. Marcius Philippus, jestingly referred to as Philip, king of Macedonia.
33. Atticus' house was on the Quirinal hill.
34. i.e. about a new wife or Cicero, who had divorced Terentia earlier in the year.
35. The first sentence refers to the repayment of Tullia's dowry; the second to Cicero's debt to his divorced wife. This Terentia had made over to Balbus in order to enforce payment quicker. The shrine mentioned below was intended to be in honour of Tullia.
36. Apparently Atticus had asked to have the Epicurean view in the De Finibus put in the mouth of some friend of his.
37. Apparently an augur had to bring evidence of ill-health attested by three other augurs to escape attendance on regular meetings and inaugural banquets.
38. This Consolation was published and became famous in antiquity, but it is now lost except for fragments.
39. To his province in Cisalpine Gaul.
40. 69 B.C.
41. Cicero now entertained a strange plan to deify Tullia and build her a shrine. He began to look for property near Rome in which to do this.
42. Antony had bought Pompey's confiscated property, but had not paid for it, and his sureties were in danger of an execution on their property. Therefore he quickly returned to Rome from Narbo, whither he had gone on his way to joining Caesar in Spain. Cf. the Second Philippic, 76, 77.
43. Tullia's child by Dolabella. He was born in January, but only lived for a few months.
44. Cotta was a celebrated orator, and held the consulship in 75 B.C. His mother Rutilia survived him, according to Seneca (Consol. ad Helviam, 16, 7).
45. See letter xii.14.3.
46. About Brutus' book on Cato. What follows concerns Brutus' account of Cato's role in the debate on the fate of the Catilinarians on 5 December 63.
47. 'Aestimatio' = land made over by a debtor to a creditor at a valuation.
48. Three celebrated philosophers, Carneades, Diogenes, and Critolaus, came to Rome in 155 B.C. to plead against the fine of 500 talents imposed on Athens for raiding Oropus.
49. For engērama cf. XII. 29; others take it to mean a "solace for old age."
50. A grammarian of Cos. Cf. VII. 3.
51. Cicero refers to the arrangement with Terentia for the repayment of her dowry.
52. The son of Tullia and Dolabella, so called because Dolabella was adopted into the plebeian gens of the Lentuli in 49 B.C. in order to stand for the tribunate.
53. Shuckburgh takes this as "I think Egnatius is making a very good bargain." But it seems difficult to get that out of the Latin. Cf. also XII. 32, 1.
54. Others take 'destinare' here in the Plautine sense of "buy"; and Shuckburgh translates the end of the sentence "if we should include something else, which he is anxious to get rid of, as he had of his own accord determined not to do so."
55. His nephew Quintus, who had joined Caesar in Spain and was traducing him.
56. Antisthenes was the founder of the Cynic School at Athens. He wrote a work in ten volumes, of which two, books 4 and 5, were called Cyrus.
57. Of Fulvinius nothing is known, save what is inferred from this passage, that he was a person given to spreading false reports.
58. The 'Academica' and 'De Finibus', unless, as Reid suggests, the 'Academica' alone is meant, as that was originally divided into two books.
59. A statue of Caesar with the inscription Deo Invicto had been put recently in the temple of Quirinus on the Quirinal hill, which he had restored after its destruction by fire in 49 B.C. Atticus' house and the temple of Salus were also on the Quirinal.
60. An impostor named Amatias or Herophilus. He was a veterinary surgeon, and was put to death by Antony after he had set up a column in the forum in Caesar's memory. Marius married Julia, aunt of Caesar; their son was adopted by Gratidia, grandmother of Cicero, and married a daughter of L. Crassus, the orator. Hence the claims of relationship asserted in this letter.
61. When he was younger, Cicero had written a poem about Marius, the famous general.
62. Balbus and Oppius.
63. Atticus had commented on the difficulty of rendering Greek philosophic terms in Latin.
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